So, yeah. I finally read Brené Brown. Why did I put that goodness off for so long? I watched all of her Ted talks long ago, but instead of fast tracking her books to the front of my queue the moment they were released, I let them linger behind other (far less worthy) titles. But now I've made up for lost time and MAN, AM I GLAD. 2015 was a year that brought challenges - lots of them. I'm not opposed to struggle, honestly. I just get impatient with the way struggle can sometimes slow you down or throw off your groove. For a few years, I'd been building momentum in one direction and then, suddenly, life had alternate plans. I fought it. I tried to force my will on life. I tried to manhandle forces that just won't be manhandled.
It was all pretty pointless. But kind of funny. In a REALLY humbling way.
Toward the end of 2015, I was feeling a little like a solitary leftover balloon - still floating, but slooooooowly losing buoyancy. It was disconcerting. I'm a forward moving machine and stalling out was super uncomfortable. I had a lot of questions I couldn't answer. What did I want to do with my career - continue freelancing, or go back to a full time job? I love freelancing, but as a person who thrives on being around creative energy, freelancing for three years left me pretty lonely.
And then, just before and after the holidays, I had two beloved family members pass away.
It was during those grief-stricken six weeks as 2015 closed out that I finally made time to tackle Rising Strong. Even better, I listened to the audiobook, which Brené Brown herself narrates. (Hi, Texas accent, I've been missing you.) And in the midst of a period of incredible sadness, I began to feel the cogs move and things begin to click into place. Here was the stirring I'd been missing, the itch that made me almost run to my laptop to get down an idea, the phrase that absolutely insisted it be written down.
If you haven't read Rising Strong, go do it. I feel like it should be required reading for any emotionally intelligent human being. It can only make your life better, pinky promise.
And thus was born my resolution for 2016. I will show up and be seen. I will reckon, rumble, and rise strong. I will dare greatly. Here's to all the beautiful, heartbreaking, vulnerable, wholehearted things that may come of it.